Tuesday, July 9, 2013


Before I start here, let me make a heartfelt note of apology to all the poliotical ..err political or social watchmen of religion who might find it very tempting to put me behind bars after reading this. 

Ever since I can remember, the first impression of God was given to me by Doordarshan which used to air Sri Krishna. I was very kindly told by my mother that Krishna was a super intelligent God who reincarnated on earth to bash up all the bad boys off the face of this earth. So I had to be a good boy and drink up all the milk she had brought for me. Then after a few months, I asked my mother about one particularly interested dude who stayed in Himalayas and smoked pot. Although I envy this blessed soul’s life now, then I became confused when she told me that he was also a God. I figured how could there be two Gods? Needless to say, I was shocked beyond description when I later came to know that there were more than some odd 33 Million Gods in the Indian Market Association of God (IMAG) as of today. That must have been more than the total population of Bhutan. Funnily enough, IMAG sounds a bit like IMDB which is the central Database of all the movies made across all over the world. Just like IMDB, this association would be having a record of each and every God where he/she would have been adjudged on different parameters and given a final rating on a scale of 10. Then we could also choose from the top 250 list of Gods whom we were going to choose for worship. It would have been so much better if we had the discretion to choose our own God depending on the rating and worshipper-reviews of that particular one. I like to believe that we would have been so much lesser confused in the choice of God than we are today. 

Over the period of my existence in this religiously charged society, I became aware of the hierarchy that exists in the Divine Management. Starting from the top, there is Lord Vishnu who, according to my very scarce knowledge of Indian mythology, is the founder of all the Indian Gods. This guy stays somewhere in the ocean sprawled on a giant serpent with his wife. And rent-free of course. Why? Well because he is the God. There is not much I can say about him but he appears to be quite a lazy fellow to me who sends someone with all his powers for all those who supposedly screwed up on earth. There have been two incarnations of Lord Vishnu until now, Lord Rama and Lord Krishna who have played an instrumental layer in cleaning up the mess of this earth. These two forms of God have also been very prominent figures in Indian God fraternity. Like the top rated guys in the IMAG database. While Lord Vishnu is enjoying a war battle like a match of WWE with probably pop corns and soda in two of his many hands, Lord Krishna or Rama down on earth are fighting the most hideous villains of our ancient history. Just sounds like someone who is sitting at the top of a society. Moreover, the choice of Lord Vishnu’s resting mattress is quite peculiar too. A colossal snake with five heads that might as well have been Anaconda’s father. I fail to understand such a melodramatic and queer choice of place for someone as important as God. Was it because Lord Vishnu’s accommodation was infested with too many rodents or he used it just to be cool amongst his friends? But I can’t complaint much on the bed or the bedroom of Lord Vishnu because I certainly don’t want to get thrashed up by the mace he keeps by his side in case someone tries to get too smart with him by intruding into his private space.

Next in the hierarchy are the two Lords who are like the CEOs of this world. One is Lord Bramha and the other is Lord Shiva. While the former is an old man sitting in an armchair of lotus, the other is the cool dude draped stylishly in a leopard skin with killing dancing skills and getting high on grass. Bramha is portrayed as an aging man with Dumbledore-ish beard, great sagacity and four heads. The fashion statement of having multi heads amongst Gods is a bit difficult to comprehend. Now although difficult to believe, Lord Bramha is one of the lowest scorers in our Lord rating chart. There is only one temple of Bramha in the entire world and he appears rarely ever in the pictures of many Gods that are there in the market today. May be there are but I haven’t seen much of him on the key rings, pendants, amulets or other lucky talismans that we carry with ourselves. He seems a bit forgotten and kind of a loner who is sitting up there silently with brimming wisdom and eight eyes blinking simultaneously in all the four directions. He is further overshadowed by the popularity of his own daughter Goddess Saraswati who is very frequently summoned by desperately religious students for helping them in achieving good scores in exams. She is probably the Lord sensation of all the school or college going students. Lord Bramha also doesn’t appear to be one who features in the most favorite gods’ list of humans and demons as he is never seen worshipped by either of them.  We also don’t see him associated even with BJP which is a bit disappointing for a Hindu God when no one is wielding any weapons in his name shouting as ‘Jai ho Bramha’

Lord shiva on the other hand and in a rather sharp contrast to Bramha appears to be insanely celebrated by many sections of the society. Ranging from veteran dopers to cannibalistic Aghoris, Lord Shiva enjoys a very huge and jealous fan following. He wears leopard skin with total panache without having to worry about Animal right activists. He can easily chop off the head of his own son and replace it afterwards with that of an elephant on being denied entry in his own house. It looks like either Lord Shiva didn’t pay much attention to the factor of uniformity or he liked elephants way too much. He is also brave enough to keep a snake coiled around his neck, don a crescent atop his head like a hat or something and keep a woman who also happens to be an inexhaustible source of water safely hidden under his long and curly hair locks. I’m sure he never has to worry about shampooing his hair due to shortage of water. What makes him way cooler than his other colleagues is the fact that he is a great toker and an even greater dancer who can score any girl with his state of the art grooves. I’m compelled by the force of my imagination to think about him all red eyed and dancing wildly with long untied hair waving and bouncing all across his face. Call it the effect of his super stud status but he has been able to achieve the exceptional feat of making people of this otherwise prudish society worship his penis or ‘Lingh’. Dude, can you be any more awesome? Unlike Bramha, he has got an entire army of fiercely loyal fans known as Kanvadias shouting ‘Bam bam Bhole’ and bringing the traffic of many cities to a stand-still. No wonder why this guy soars high in the popularity chart of Hindu Gods. Take a bow or Bam Bam Bhole

After the likes of Shiva, come the most useless folks of Hindu mythology. The many devas like Indra and party. They report directly to all the three Gods and have an uncanny knack of getting into trouble all the time. Their only job is to watch sultry and seductive item numbers performed by the luscious and curvaceous maidens of heavens, drink booze and getting bullied by the ‘Asuras’ or demons. Apparently, Gods belonging to this particular strata are rendered so powerless and inferior by their foes in the battle that every time they have to call their seniors and superiors for support. When they are not getting kicked or bullied, they take leisurely strolls on earth as imposters looking for a hot wife of some Rishi Muni only to get caught in the act and cursed by him. Real dumbasses.

Why is the market of Gods and religion thriving and prosperous today? When I come to think of it, I think there is not much difference in the states of Hindu Gods and software industry. While there are so many of them, one is never sufficient to run the system. If that is the idea of real God, may God help us.

Sunday, July 7, 2013

And the Mountains echoed-Khaled Hosseini

The plot of ‘And the Mountains echoed’ is set as a circular course which begins with Abdullah and his little sister Pari who is separated from him at the onset of the story and completes with them re uniting again. As the tale unfolds further, many more characters surface up with each having a quite descriptive and often painful account of their respective pasts. Destiny takes an unforgiving turn when the Soviets raid Afghanistan and Pari, who has been adopted by a wealthy family and has no recollection whatsoever of her past is forced to move to Paris with her Maman or step mother. After many intervening years when Pari is old and graying, she receives a letter written by her uncle in which he gives a detailed account of her life which is as diminished and hazy in her memory as is her brother who is now living in San Francisco. She finally decides to meet him only to find him in an ailing and heart wrenching medical condition in which he remembers his little sister but not the old woman who stands before him.

It is authors like Khaled Hosseini who possess the gifted ability to bestow such commanding force to words that the narrative containing them becomes an inescapable vortex. Through his characters, his pen very cruelly rips open the most fundamental layers of human heart and soul and blasts away the imagination of the readers with every letter acting as a shrapnel. The liquid ease with which he manages to make the reader helplessly vulnerable and puncture the deepest and closely guarded emotional realms is as unbelievable as it is brilliant. He never fails to impress the reader with his splendid usage of imagery and precision in words that are nothing less than beautiful. His attention to detail in giving shape to every character, in drawing the core of its psyche, in chalking out its emotional and mental silhouettes is the pure genius of a true craftsman. 
However, I wish I could say the storyline was as perfect and tightly knit for which Hosseini is known. No matter how compelling and profound his way of storytelling might be but the insignificance of some of the characters appears as tiny cracks in the otherwise seamless tale of love and longing. Though in isolation, these characters are given an exquisite treatment and yet the central plot doesn’t seem to accommodate them deservingly and these characters are lost, in a rather disappointing manner into the depths of the plot. Often, the story meanders from its purpose to distant shores which are difficult to justify with the context. The sheer delight and pleasure one derives being in the company of such gorgeous words is, to some extent, taken away by the length to which they are described.

Had it not been Hosseini, I would not have been much disappointed with the way the story ends but this is the inevitable burden of expectations that writers of such caliber and repute are doomed to carry. After all the heartbreaks and endurance of grief, I was looking forward to an ending that could comfort me with a sense of contentment and fulfillment. But sadly, the climax of the book is nothing like that. It left me suspended with an unquenched feeling that one gets savoring a really delicious dish from which one essential or key ingredient is missing.

In the end, this new book might or might not be Hosseini’s best work but it is, though not in its entirety, a great book.  

Thursday, June 27, 2013

A phenomena called as Manager

Call it a mere co-incidence or my sense of prejudice, but there are some very peculiar similarities, if not congruency between the words Manager and Maneater apart from the phonetics. Let us for a short moment ponder over the standard definitions of Maneater provided in various Lexicons. The referential meaning of the word is a woman who has illicit affairs with many men without actually loving any of them. The direct and obvious meaning is an animal who preys on humans and eats them. Now, if I join the above two statements and take the liberty of some biased assumptions, the meaning remolds itself to someone who is a dispassionate, heartless animal, is involved with multiple men and relishes the taste of their flesh above any tongue pleasing ingredient. Sounds familiar? I know.

So how do we identify these rotten sons of bitches? Well, we don’t have to because this species has a habit of making its presence felt with pig like expressions and an intimidating stench that would make you feel like throwing up (often on them). If you have ever been able to imagine a gigantic snake dressed up in crisp linen with its mouth wide open to sting you with ridiculous volumes of work and hissing in your ears every half an hour “so, what’s the status?”, you are a certain and unfortunate victim of a very common yet remediless bite of which eventually you would learn to get used to. Although there is no permanent cure of this pain, you can always try using the most vehement and wild abuses as an analgesic to soothe the suffering. It is very interesting to take note that the word ‘anal’gesic fits so naturally and comfortably in this context. It would not sound surprising to me if someday some brave language revolutionaries are officially able to make the words Manager and Pain-in-the-Ass synonymous to each other.Now talking of the methods of dealing with Manager-bite, the bigger the levels of cusses, the better you would feel from inside. In fact, every corporate office should have this weekly activity called as Cuss the Puss in which you get to shout abuses to your manager in the fiercest of your pitch in an open space with your colleagues, just like laughter therapy sessions. I strongly believe that no other thing on this earth would be more gratifying than this.Not even sex. Of course there are many other and better methods than this in my mind which regrettably cannot be written here for the sake of decency. May your imagination get the better of you.

Let me elaborate more on the qualities and virtues of the InCorporate Bastards. They are generally big headed with a thick skull protecting a useless and often absent lump of saturated fat which in normal terms is called as Brain. The most wretched thing with them is the universal fact that the ratio between their brains and mouths tends to zero (according to0/infinity rule). I just hope that your knowledge of rudimentary calculus is not as low as their IQs to get what I said. Now since their shit ball (I don’t want to flatter them to unimaginable and unrealistic limits by calling it a brain) is heavily guarded by an almost rock solid crust, it is absolutely impenetrable to intelligent and sensible talks as if they are weapons of mass destruction and allowing them to fall would yield in a terrible holocaust. Try telling them something which is even remotely intelligent and get the treat of your life by staring at the look of the stupidest look of bewilderment on their faces. Their defiance to logic is so murderous that even a dog would want to take a leak in their mouths if sometimes in the darkest moments of mankind and dogkind, the latter is compared with the former. But adopting a bit honesty there, I do not blame them for their condition because a long time of rear licking can cause such levels of mental disasters. Moreover, boot and booty licking require no brains and that is perhaps the reason why every good manager is an even better bootylicker. See, it’s an inseparable part of the parcel.

Their eyes are just like those of jackals. Miraculously divine co incidence yet again at the similarity between the words Jackals and Jackass. Those two gloating eyes staring down at you like an innocent and helpless prey who they can play with before killing it and finally eating it.

I’m not seeing any output from you.

You must do something to improve your performance.

I'm not happy with the pace at which things are moving from your end

You must stay back today to finish this off today itself.

Where are the results?

The list does not know the end. I’m not seeing any output from you. (I never knew you are fucking blind). You must do something to improve your performance. (How about killing you?). I’m not happy with the pace at which things are moving from your end (Oh I’m sorry, Would you like some lap dance?). You must stay back today to finish this off today itself (Because the world would collapse tomorrow and all the debris would gravitate towards your ass?). Where are the results? (Have you tried Colonoscopy?).

Now we all must understand that all managers can defecate from mouths as well. This is by far the most distinctive feature of them. Every breath they take out and every word they transmit into the air makes it even more polluting that it already is. I think that World environment forum should impose a lifetime ban on their speech for this because it is as threatening to the balance of the nature as the effect of Carbon Monoxide. Or our government which is so clever at levying useless taxes at us, should for once do something which would really benefit the entire nation and levy tax on every word at they speak. If that happens, I can bet on their idiosyncrasy, which also happens to be their most precious asset that you won’t hear even a squeak out of them. Just like they do when their managers are speaking to them. It is almost orgasmic imagining them standing timidly in front of their big daddies with tails curled deep in between their shivering legs.

Not very long ago, I came to realize a very sad fact when someone told me over the phone that while being in a corporate world, you never work for the company but for the manager and manager is always right. Even if he is an incurable asshole.


Sunday, June 24, 2012

The choice of a perspective

When I look up at the rainbow, I thank the gods for giving me a chance to witness a phenomenon whose beauty is all encompassing and enchanting. I also thank the colors for gathering at a place and holding one another in a seamless perfection. Yes, I love the rainbow. It kindles a hope in me that the best and the most mesmerizing things in life are realized somewhere between the edges of strife and courage.

When I look up at the rainbow, I wonder why God created something whose very existence is nothing more than an ephemeral illusion. I can very well imagine the colors making a shameless mockery of all those who are tricked into believing in something that doesn’t really exist. That is the reason I don’t like the rainbow. For me, it stands as the epitome of deceit and bluff which, to say the least is guilty of being an impostor. Nothing more, nothing less.

Despite the rainbow being the same to everyone, why is it held in such stark contrast? Why for one, it inspires a brilliant flash of hope while the other sees it with a downright cynical tint? The answer to this can’t be sought in or equated with any logical equivalence. Its roots can rather be traced down to the emotional construct one is composed of. Everyone perceives situations and people as per its own understanding, interpretation and experiences of life which is the point of origin of the definitions that define us as a person and consequently shape our perceptions. For someone who has been on the dark and gloomy aspect of life for long is more likely to be aggressive, pessimistic and perhaps, withdrawn. And conversely, one who has had positive encounters with life would be more poised, optimistic and gregarious.

But having said that, I must admit that the traits enlisted above are based on the assumptions of how one WOULD react and they don’t touch upon the possibility of a choice that beholds the power to alter the course of destiny altogether. The choice of a perspective. Yes, we do have the authority and ability to choose our own perspectives because whatever we make out of our lives largely depend on the kind of outlook and motivation that has gone into building it. Some people count the number of steps that they have travelled and some people count the number of steps that are yet to be travelled. And the feeling at this juncture makes all the difference about how the rest of the journey is going to be. Every turn will not come out to be a pleasant surprise. Not every person is going to be as good as your imagination or expectation. There are more chances of heartbreaks than the promises of love. The shrieks of unjust rejections outnumber the whispers of a sincere embrace.

But irrespective of what you have been offered, you must withhold the indispensable wisdom to choose from amongst all the perspectives that lie ahead, the one which is most right; for you can’t choose the outcome but you can certainly choose the perceptions. Now whether you believe it not, a small voice inside our gut always guides us to this one path which leads us to where we truly deserve to be. And each and everyone of us must make at least one honest attempt to choose from the range of perspectives and see for ourselves where it leads us to.

Bon Voyage.

Monday, January 30, 2012

चिकनी चमेली गाने का अर्थ

अभी मुन्नी की बदनामी और शीला की जवानी की आग की गर्मी अभी ठंडी भी नहीं पड़ी थी की पुरूषों की उत्तेजना इन्द्रियों पर अपने पल्लू से ढलकते यौवन को लेकर दस्तक देने अ गयी है चिकनी चमेली| यूँ तो बहन चमेली की चिकनाहट के किस्से आज समूचे भारत के बच्चे, नौजवान एवं बूढ़े की लपलपाती जुबां पर हैं परन्तु फिर भी आज हम अनुच्छेद दर अनुच्छेद बहन चमेली के द्वि अर्थीय शब्दों एवं उनके तात्पर्यों का व्याख्यान करेंगे|

 बिछु ये रे नैना 
बड़ी ज़हरीली आंख मारे
कमसिन कमरिया साली
एक ठुमके से लाख मारे 

 यहाँ बहन चमेली अपने नैना और कमर का वर्णन करते हुए बताती हैं की वो दोनों बहुत ही खतरनाक एवं जानलेवा हैं| जहां एक ओर उनकी आँखें बिच्छु जैसी ज़हर उगलती हैं वहीँ उनकी कमसिन कमर का मात्र एक ठुमका ही एक बार में लाख आदमियों को ढेर कर देता है| यहाँ पर बहन चमेली के आक्रामक एवं हिंसात्मक रूप के दर्शन होते हैं| दुसरे शब्दों में कहा जाए तो बहन चमेली अपनी चौबीस इंची की कमरिया को किसी परमाणु अस्त्र से कम नहीं आंकती| परन्तु यहाँ पर अतिश्योक्ति यह है की बहन चमेली अपनी कमर को नाज़ुक बताने के बावजूद भी लाख लोगों को मार गिराने का हवाई दावा कैसे ठोक रही हैं| ध्यान देने वाली बात यह भी है की शुरुवात में वह अपनी कमर को साली कहकर संबोधित कर रही हैं| उनके इस कथन से पाठक पल क्षण भर क लिए गुमराह ज़रूर हो जाता है ओर उसे ऐसा प्रतीत होता है जैसे बहन चमेली कमर के दर्द से त्रस्त हैं|

 नोट हज़ारों के खुल्ले छुट्टे कराने आई 
हुस्न की तीली से बीडी चिल्लम जलाने आई 

  अब बहन चमेली पाठक को अपनी सेवाओं से अवगत करवाती हैं| वह कहती हैं की अब किसी भी पुरुष को हज़ार के छुट्टे करवाने के लिए किसी के आगे हाथ फैलाने की आवश्यकता नहीं है क्यूंकि उनके पास पांच दस पचास सौ और पांच सौ के नोटों का भण्डार भरा हुआ है | इसका अर्थ यह हुआ की बहन चमेली एक ऐसा चलता फिरता ऐ टी एम् हैं जिसमें कोई भी व्यक्ति हज़ार का नोट डालकर अपनी मनचाही मूल्यवर्ग के नोट निकाल सकता है| वह आगे बताती हैं की उनका हुस्न किसी जलती तीली सा गरम है और धूम्रपान के आदि पुरुष अपनी तलब उनके हुस्न से बुझा सकते हैं|  
 आई चिकनी चमेली 
छुपके अकेली
पहुआ चढ़ा के आई 

यहाँ पर बहन चमेली आत्मा प्रशंसा की पराकाष्ठा पर चढ़कर स्वयं को चिकनी नाम से संबोधित करती हैं| उनके कहने का तात्पर्य यह है की उनका बदन इतना फिसलन भरा है की कोई भी शरीफ आदमी उसपर बिना फिसले चल नहीं सकता| वह अब पाठक के समक्ष एक और खुलासा करती हैं कि वह अपने बाप एवं भाइयों को घर पर सोता छोड़ मदिरा के नशे में धुत्त होकर बिलकुल अकेली आई हैं| अब यहाँ पर पाठक के मन में बहन चमेली के चाल चलन को लेकर तनिक संदेह उठता है|आखिर किसी भी इज्ज़तदार घर की लड़की मदिरा सेवन करके कहीं भी अकेले क्यूँ जाएगी|

जंगले में आज मंगल करुँगी 
भूखे शेरों से खेलूंगी मैं 
मक्खन जैसी हथेली पे जलते  
अंगारे ले लुंगी मैं 

इन पंक्तियों के माध्यम से बहन चमेली अपने व्यक्तित्व का खूंखार एवं निडर पहलु उजागर करती हैं| वह अपनी भविष्य की गतिविधियों की अति संवेदनशील एवं व्यक्तिगत जानकारी पाठक के साथ बाँटती हैं| वह यहाँ कई बातों को कोड वर्ड में समझाने का प्रयत्न करती मालूम पड़ती हैं| अगर उनके शब्दों की गहराई में उतरा जाए और परतों को उधेडा जाए तो बड़े बेचैन और हैरान करने वाले तथ्य सामने आते हैं| जंगले से उनका तात्पर्य एक ऐसी एकांत जगह से है जहां परिंदे भी पर न मारते हों जैसे घर के बेडरूम या किसी पार्क का कोई सुनसान कोना| वह आगे बताती हैं की ऐसी किसी जगह पर वो कोई ऐसी क्रिया करने वाली हैं जिस से सभी को परम सुख की प्राप्ति होगी| अगली पंक्ति में वह भूखे शेरों के साथ खेलने की बात करती हैं| दरसल यहाँ पर भूखे शेरों को ऐसे पुरुषों के सन्दर्भ में प्रयोग किया गया है जिनकी कामेच्छाएं अपने चरम पर होने के बावजूद अतृप्त हैं| आगे वह अपनी हथेली की नरमाहट को मक्खन के समान बताते हुए उस पर बड़ी ही निडरता से धधकते अंगारे लेने की बात करती हैं| अब बहन चमेली जवानी के जोश में इस तरह का पागलपन क्यूँ कर रही हैं यह तो बहन चमेली ही जानें|

गहरे पानी की मछली हूँ राजा
घाट घाट दरिया में घूमी हूँ मैं 
तेरी नज़रों की लहरों से हारकर आज डूबी हूँ मैं 

 यहाँ पर पाठक को बहन चमेली के अदभुत अनुभव की झलक देखने को मिलती है| वह कहती हैं की वह एक गहरे पानी की मछली हैं और बहुत से घाटों पर घूमी हैं अर्थात उन्होंने हर चीज़ का काफी नीचे तक अध्ययन किया है | उक्त पंक्तियों में बहन चमेली के गहराइयों के अनुभव वाकई में प्रशंसनीय हैं| परन्तु अब वह कहती हैं कि आज वह किसी कि तालाब जैसी आँखों में हारकर डूब गयी| यह कथन पाठक को थोड़ी उलझन में दाल देता है क्यूंकि मछली का पानी में डूब जाना एक अपाच्य बात है| 

जानलेवा जलवा है
देखने में हलवा है
प्यार से परोस दूंगी
टूट ले ज़रा
यह तो ट्रेलर है
पूरी फिल्लम दिखाने आई 

अब बहन चमेली पाठक को सत्य तथा भ्रान्ति के बीच का अंतर समझाते हुए कहती है कि जो दिखता है वह असल में होता नहीं है| जैसे उनके सौंदर्य का जलवा जो देखने में हलवे जैसा अर्थात खाने में मीठा नरम और आसान है असल में उतना ही कठिन सख्त एवं जानलेवा है व उसके दर्शन करना इतना सरल नहीं जितना प्रतीत होता है | परन्तु आखिर बहन चमेली भी आखिरकार एक नारी हैं और उनके ह्रदय में भी प्रेम का एक असीम सागर बहता है| शायद इसीलिए अब वह पाठक को प्रेरित करते हुए कहती हैं की वह उनके मक्खन जैसे हाथों से परोसे गए अद्वितीय सौंदर्य के गरमा गरम हलवे पर टूट पड़ने में ज़रा भी विलम्ब न करे| वह एक बार फिर से पाठक को सांकेतिक भाषा में समझाने की कोशिश करती हैं कि जो वह देख और समझ रहा है वह तो उनका केवल एक छोटा सा ट्रेलर है| बहन चमेली तो आज पूरी फिल्म दिखाने का पक्का निश्चय करके आई हैं| हम आशा करते हैं कि यह फिल्म थ्री डी और सी डी में भी उपलब्ध होगी|

बंजर बस्ती में आई है मस्ती
ऐसा नमकीन चेहरा तेरा 
मेरी नीयत पर चेह्के छूटे न है रंग गहरा तेरा 

यहाँ बहन चमेली अपने पाठक की प्रशंसा करते हुए कहती हैं की उसकी नमकीन शक्ल पर इतना तेज और रौनक है जैसे किसी बंजर और बदरंग पड़ी बस्ती में एकाएक चहल पहल और हर्षोल्लास का आगमन हुआ हो| अपनी प्रेम गगरी पाठक पर उड़ेलते हुए वह आगे कहती हैं की उनकी नीयत पर उसका गहरा रंग चढ़ चूका है और अब वह पूर्णतः पाठक के रंग में रंगी हुयी हैं| इसका अर्थ यह निकल कर आता है कि अब पाठक बहन चमेली से कुछ भी मांग सकता है और कुछ भी करवा सकता है|  

जोबन यह मेरा कैंची है राजा
सारे पर्दों को काटूँगी मैं 
शामें मेरी अकेली हैं आजा
संग तेरे बाटूंगी मैं 

बहन चमेली अब अपने जोबन यानी जवानी की तुलना कैंची से करते हुए कहती हैं की जिस प्रकार एक कैंची अपनी दो टांगों के बीच में आने वाली हर वस्तू को क़तर देती है ठीक उसी प्रकार उनका यौवन भी अत्यंत तीखा एवं पैना है तथा उसके बीच में आने वाले हर परदे को तुरंत काट दिया जाएगा| अपने इस कथन से बहन चमेली के बोल्ड एवं बिंदास चरित्र के बारे में जानकारी मिलती है और उनके हर परदे को नष्ट करने की आतुरता देख कर हमें यह मालूम पड़ता है कि वह  लज्जा के पर्दों की जगह खुलेपन में काफी विश्वास रखती हैं| आगे बहन चमेली अपने पाठक को बताती हैं की शाम के समय उनके घर पर कोई नहीं होता और वह एकदम अकेली होती हैं| वह कहती हैं कि उनके लिए लिए अब अपनी शामें अकेली काटना काफी कठिन हो चला है इसीलिए वह पाठक को शामें बांटने के नाम पर अपने घर आने का एक खुला निमंत्रण देती हैं| परन्तु बहन चमेली के रंगीन चरित्र से परिचित व्यक्ति यह भली भाँती समझ जाते हैं कि बहन चमेली उनके साथ क्या बांटने की बात कर रही हैं|    

बातों में इशारा है
जिसमें खेल सारा है
तोड के तिजोरियों को लूट ले ज़रा 
चूम के ज़ख्मों को थोडा मलहम लगाने आई 

अपने अंतिम वक्तव्य में बहन चमेली अब एकदम स्पष्ट कर देती हैं कि उनकी बातें द्वि अर्थीय एवं इशारों से भरी हुई हैं| जो व्यक्ति उनके संकेतों को समझने में सफल हो गया वही बहन चमेली के इस हसीं खेल का विजेता है| अब विजेता को क्या ईनाम मिलेगा इस बात का अनुमान तो पाठक स्वयं ही लगा सकते हैं| आगे की पंक्तियों  में बहन चमेली संकोच के सभी दुपट्टे नीचे सरका कर पाठक को साड़ी तिजोरियों को  तोड़ कर सब कुछ लूट लेने के लिए उकसाती हैं| यहाँ पर स्वाभाविक ही मुझे एक कथन याद आता है जिसमें एक अकेली लड़की को खुली तिजोरी के बराबर बताया गया है| बहन चमेली इस कथन से प्रेरणा लेते हुए पाठक को आगे बढ़कर तिजोरी को लूटने का इशारा करती हैं| अंतिम पंक्ति में बहन चमेली शर्म के सभी दुपट्टों को नीचे सरकाते हुए दो टूक बात में यह साफ़ कर देती हैं की उनके होंठ एक अचूक औषधि के समान हैं और किसी भी चोट वाले स्थान पर उन्हें अगर लगाया जाए तो दर्द से तुरंत आराम मिलता है | कितनी उदार व दयावान हैं बहन चमेली की किसी भी पुरुष की पीड़ा देखकर उनका ह्रदय पसीज जाता है और वह उस के पीड़ा स्थान पर अपने फूल से कोमल होंठ लगाकर उसे ठीक कर देती हैं|  

हम आशा करते हैं कि बहन चमेली की चिकनाहट सदैव बनी रहे और सौंदर्य की जो अद्भुत मशाल उन्होंने जलाई है उसकी आग पुरुषों में कभी भी ठंडी न पड़े|   

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Ephemeral randomness

Here is a list of short one liners that often cross my mind. I tend to save them somewhere if I find them worthy enough.

1. Let us walk over the silken sky of moonlit dreams before the sun rises again and poisons it to a blue reality

2. You never need to tilt the vessel which beholds talent. It has a habit of spilling itself.

3. An atheist is not one who is too arrogant to believe in god. He's simply too wise to believe that God should never be bothered with trivial demands.

4. White smoke arising from a burning cigarette, weaving random patterns then receding away from each other, finally surrendering themselves to non existence. We, the white smoke; and life, the burning cigarette.

5. Every golden syllable that crossed our breaths is hanging to my lips, floating inside my eyes. May be I'll never say, may be you'll never see.

6. It's amusing to see the miracles of friendship. It pulls you out from the deepest of despair. It teaches you that the unbounded joy of life comes through sharing, be it food, clothes, happiness or sadness. That nothing in this world is more blissful than a smile on your friends' faces even if it comes at the cost of yours. ultimately, it makes you realize that the greatest gift of friendship is friendship itself

7. I'm yet to come across a day in life not regretting about the past, not contemplating about the present and not fearing about the future.

8. Sometimes, I am too busy to ponder about how bad my life has been to realize how worse it could have been.

9. Life doesn' always grant what we wish for, as only it knows the unseen stupidities of our hearts and minds.

10. Never be ashamed of your mediocrity for excellence is nothing but the later stage of it.

11. A gaze of your existence,a breath of your fragrance, neither in some anticipation nor in any remembrance, Transient moments locked inside the closet of our eyes, beauties of life left behind, plunging into death's acceptance

12. In the monochromes of a sombre sky, 
I watched a rainbow made of true colors,
And raindrops sliding down it innocently,
To paint me in your love for an eternity

I wonder whether you could see it too

13. Come, on the valleys of silence, let's make a bridge of words for we are just a few syllables away from union and just a slip away from separation.

14. The inevitability of the future can not be stopped by the fear from it.

15. I can never be stupid enough to understand how smart I am and can never be smart enough to understand how stupid I am.

16. We make many friends, a few good friends, a fewer best friends and rarely ever a true friend.

17. Sometimes it occurs to me that hatred is a truer emotion than love for it is far more passionate, sincere and pure in its nature. Moreover, you can afford to be disloyal in love but not in hatred.

18. I don’t fear death for it is the greatest inevitability but I do fear life for it is the greatest illusion.

19. It seems rather ironical to me that nothing in this world teaches us the art of living better than the fear of death.

20. We humans are the greatest masochists. We have an unusual knack of turning towards exactly the things which would destroy us in the end.

21. There are a lot of lessons I've learnt from my Mother. Not being like her is one of them.

22. Every righteous idiot has a great imagination. His talks always revolve around Should Be-s and Must Be-s.

23. We must always listen to the advise and words of the elders if we want our lives to be insanely boring

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Unleashing Genius by Dilip Mukerjea-Book review

Every night when we go to bed, surrounded by a deep silence, a wild rush of thoughts seems to overpower us and our imaginative capabilities. We tend to think towards the unthinkable directions and suddenly the limits of the horizons seem to stretch themselves a little bit further pushing away our inhibitions, redefining dimensions and breaking all the conventions. Holding onto a chain of some random thoughts, we travel across the length and breadth of the universe, even reaching for the stars and be supreme of all. Everyone of us has this sneaking desire to be known as a genius amongst our peers but due to the some reasons, we always manage to convince ourselves that it is far beyond our reach to excel and realize the most wonderful gift given to us, our Brain.

As a matter of fact, we DO have the potential to break our boundaries and truly become a genius and this is the message that Dilip Mukerjea’s latest book “Unleashing genius with the world’s most powerful learning systems” gives us. Written in an exceptionally fresh, interactive and creative manner, the book reveals some of the most interesting facts about human brain, its thinking pattern and its biological makeup. Don’t we all at some point of life forget a vital link between events that is the essentiality of the moment or don’t we all have difficulty remembering names, places and dates (if you have a girl friend, you will agree with me on my last point)? This is the book that tells us about how we can become more organized and less forgetful in life just by picking up little clues that are scattered everywhere around us.

Through this highly innovative and illustrative book, Mukerjea has tried to give a deeper insight into the unexplored and more often than not unutilized potential of the human mind but in a fun way. Flowing as smooth as a fresh stream of water in a waterfall, it takes you into your own mind, its intricacies and areas that can still be improved no matter how old or young you are. The book is divided into ten chapters each covering one aspect and function of the brain and then giving out its complete elaboration with exercises at the end of each chapter to give your brain cells a run for their neurons which would make you fall even more with the book and your brain. And don’t get surprised if while reading the book, you get transported back into your kindergarten days when every word and picture had an action associated with it. No wonder why most of us still remember those nursery rhymes that we learnt around 16-17 years back but not a chemistry equation or a mathematical formula that we learnt just a month ago.

Mukerjea’s brilliance and creativity in writing this book is definitely worth a huge applaud as it never ever lets you down with any sort of monotony or bland content. High on fun quotient, the book is alive and speaking throughout its 500 pages of life while infusing a sense of brightness in its reader. If you have a younger sibling, or even some elder around who isn’t much into reading but very much into forgetting, this book can be the ideal gift. I’m sure they’ll shower you with gifts and gratitude after reading this book.

And last but not the least I would like to say or recall one last thing. As a child, I remember having a coloring book in which a pair of identical looking pictures were drawn, out of which, one was completely colored and the other one left completely blank for us. Now I realize that it wasn’t merely an empty picture, it was more of a small representation of life which can be made as much beautiful and bright as we want it and a reflection of our deepest ideas which can really soar to unimaginable heights if we give them a fair chance and wings of faith. And I’m sure most of us have forgotten that drawing book as a thing of old and dusty memories. But now, it’s high time to pick up that drawing book once again and start filling it with free and bright colors and see the change for yourself.

This review is a part of the http://blog.blogadda.com/2011/05/04/indian-bloggers-book-reviews" target="_blank">Book Reviews Program at  http://www.blogadda.com">BlogAdda.com. Participate now to get free books!